The Stolen Time Machine

Noel Gallagher
Rudolph the red nosed reindeer... *hiccup*


Liam Gallagher
NOEL the red nosed DRUNKARD, more like!


Noel Gallagher
What're you talkin' 'bout, man...


Larie, Mike, Loezzy, Brendon Urie, House, Larry and Damon Albarn
JOYEUX NOEL, NOEL!!!!


Noel Gallagher
*hiccup* Wankers.

*WHILE WATCHING NIP/TUCK*


Noel Gallagher
What's a wonderwall??? Oh, C'MON.


Liam Gallagher
Well, what is it?


Noel Gallagher
YOU DON'T EVEN KNOW?


Liam Gallagher
Well, I sung it for you, but you never actually told me what it was about.


Damon Albarn
Yeah, Gallagher! I'm interested in finding out, too!


Oscar Wilde
Yes, me too. It is such a wonderfully poetic alliteration.


Noel Gallagher
UM.


Noel Gallagher
Well... It's a...


Noel Gallagher
...


Larie
Isn't it something like, your best friend? The person you throw all sorts of complaints and hopes and dreams at...


Larie
...and gives you only miracles in return?


Noel Gallagher
...


Larie
:D


Noel Gallagher
Yes, of course it is.


Noel Gallagher
Them stupid tv shows can't even figure that out.

Loezzy
So recently we've been fangirling over Spirou and Fantasio, you know, these guys:




Mirt
And I'm a fan of Pol again!




Larie
So I'm gonna go to my local comic store today and pick up some awesome childhood memories!


Loezzy
Which we're totally gonna deform, because we're fangirls now!


Larie
You know, being fans of European comics...


Larie
We should be middle-aged, married men.


Larie
And we are 19 and 16 year old girls...


Loezzy
Ah, the wonders of the internet!

Otacon
The google ads chosen for this livejournal are awesome.


Larie
Holy shit! They really are!


Larie

Adam
So, as we're all gathered round the table for our dinner, let's hear about your day!


Mirt
At school, we have to choose what we want to study. But I just don't know! I don't want to do physics, but I don't want to do another study than biomedical science, either!


Loezzy
Aw, it's not so bad. I never knew what I wanted to be, either.


Mirt
Really?


Loezzy
Well, I wanted to be a pokémon trainer when I was younger!

  
Mirt, Larie & Mike
Whoa! Me too!!


Mike
But overall, when I was a kid, I didn't want to be anything, really.


House
Well, congratulations, boy, on having achieved your goal in life!


Mike
What did YOU want to be, then?


House
Professional ballroom dancer, but that's not the point.


Hiro
I wanted to be a pro gamer when I was a kid. But now, I just want to be a hero.


Otacon
Hey! Same here!


Robert Smith
I wanted to be a bat.


Joe Strummer
I wanted to be a left-wing cartoonist and be in a punk band on the side. Turns out I liked music better, I guess.


Larie
Jesus Christ, man, are you PERFECT?


Larie
I always wanted to write and illustrate my own books, when I was little!

Bono
I wanted my band to be bigger than Coldplay!


Edge
I think you mostly wanted to become taller.


Ian Curtis
I never wanted to live.

* awkward silence *

 
Noel Gallagher & Liam Gallagher
Well that's funny, mate! We wanna live forever!

Mirt
OH! That reminds me of another favourite band of ours, who also thought they could make it one their own!


Brendon Urie
*mumblecreativedifferencesmumble*


Ryan Ross
*mumblegoingourseperatewaysmumble*


Mirt
Oh, shut up, you!


Mirt
What are you planning on doing without each other?! You belong together!


Pretty. Odd.
When the moon fell in love with the sun,
All was golden in the sky-y-yy!
All was golden when the da-ay met the ni-ight!

Ryan Ross
*mumblewewantedtokeepitprofessionalmumble*


Mirt
ALL WAS GOLDEN WHEN THE DA-AY MET THE NI-IGHT!

Larie
OH! What a wonderful CD! I remember that when it was recorded, a certain amazing band was still together, making music and actually working for their money!


Noel Gallagher
...


Larie
In fact, the memories are so great, I'm just going to put it on and listen to the whole album!


The Masterplan
*buzz*


Liam Gallagher
God, no. Turn that shite off.


Larie
*evil glare*


The Masterplan
BECAUSE WE NEE-EED EACH OTHER!
WE BELIEE-EEVE IN ONE ANOTHER!


Liam Gallagher
Fook...    *runs out of the room*


The Masterplan
AND I KNOW WEE-EE'RE GOING TO UNCOVER
WHAT'S SLEEPIN' IN OUR SOUL!


Noel Gallagher
ARGH!    *throws shoe at radio*

< TRUE STORY. >

 
Mike & Larie
*just before Coldplay's concert*


Larie
Oh man, they're almost up!


Mike
I'm so excited!


No Line on the Horizon
MAGNIFICENT! MAGNIFICENT, OOOHOOOHHH!!!!


Crowd
...


Crowd
*sings along*

 
Mike & Larie
...


Larie
Ooh. Harsh.

Loezzy
Wow, I bet you're devastated by the news.


Larie
Totally! I'm heartbroken!


Larie
But, there's also an upside!


Loezzy
How is there an upside to this?


Larie
It all went exactly like it did in my fanfic! You know, with the 'You're not the father o'that kid' and all.


Larie
This means that we don't need to worry.


Larie
They'll make up. Eventually.


Larie
In a hotel room.


Larie
In a very unconventional way for brothers, and-


Larry
SHUT UP! PLEASE!

Noel Gallagher
Grr.


Liam Gallagher
Tsk.


Oscar Wilde
Well, I assume you're happy, mister Albarn. Another warm, loving sibling relationship is detroyed.


Damon Albarn
It's just like the old days!

House
*picks up paper*


House
No. No!


Wilson
What's up?


House
We're gonna have to move soon. Even Germany'd be okay. The Netherlands are trying to get the Olympics of 2028 to their country.

- FEW MINUTES LATER -


Damon Albarn
Jesus, no! That's tax payer's money!

- FEW MINUTES LATER -


Adam
MORE MOTORWAYS?! MORE STADIUMS?!


Adam
It's impossible! There isn't any room!

Larry
I thought they had plans NOT to build any more motorways, and suddenly, when you mention the Olympics, anything is possible?!


Bono
Wait a minute, this is great!

   
House, Wilson, Adam and Larry
WHAT?!


Bono
I could sing the national anthem there!


Bono
Every contest! In every stadium!


Bono
What?


Bono
C'mon, guys! It'll be grand!

Mirt
*waves with a fan*


Mirt
It's so hot in here. Sing me that Halloween song, Ryden...


Brendon Urie
Boys and girls of every age, would you like to see something strange?


Mirt
Aah. It's already starting to cool off.


Brendon Urie
I am the one hiding under your bed...


Mirt
Hey, shouldn't you be hiding IN Ryan's bed?


Mirt
Crap. It's getting hotter again.

Loezzy
This must be, by far, the best idea ever.


Hiro
What is? Trying to convince possible deadly aliens that this backyard is the preferable place to land their vessels?


Loezzy
No.


Loezzy
But luring the aliens with this LIFE-SIZE KIRK CARDBOARD CUTOUT, is!

- IN OUTER SPACE -


Spock
Hm. Fascinating.


Spock
Happy UFO day, people of Terra.

 
Loezzy & Oscar Wilde
*watch tv*


Larry
Hey, Oscar Wilde?! I thought you didn't want to bring him here!


Oscar Wilde
Oh my. Well, you see, you gorgeous example of the human male, I asked her to.


Loezzy
All it took was mentioning our stock of homoeroticism. You know how those things go.


Larry
I... guess.


Larry
So what are you watching now?


Loezzy
DEEP SPACE III: KIRK SUTRA


Larry
What the- OH. MY. GOD.


Larry
Even in your choice of pornography, you're a complete nerd.


Loezzy
Aw, c'mon! It's not so bad! It has aliens!

Oscar Wilde
I agree. You see, dearest boy, man candy with tentacles is still man candy and...


Larry
STOP. PLEASE, STOP.


Larry
How the hell did I end up here, anyway?!

Larie
Holy shite. Mark this thought for me, mark it please.


Larie
Spock is Japanese.


Loezzy
Whoa. Why is that?

Larie
He's a workaholic, seemingly void to any emotion. He is so professional in the technologic field that he has become detached from being a living being. He seems more of a computer than a person. This comes close to the way Japanese were seen, some decades ago. And they still are seen like that, sometimes.


Larie
What's more, in the eyes of 'normal' Americans or Europeans, he's also extremely strange. His weird eyebrows might suggest Asian eyes. Plus, he's got green blood and pointy ears, which makes him fundamentally different and 'the OTHER'.


Larie
(I never thought 'Orientalism' would come in handy sometime. Hehe.)


Larie
I guess what the creators were trying to say is, though, that in their utopian future, everyone can cooperate and love each other, hence Chekov, Sulu and Uhura.


Larry
My god. Why don't you use this brilliant train of thought in your final thesis?

Larry
You never know, they're academics. They might buy this insanity.

Larie
Doesn't anyone here support me in this?!

*chirp*


Larie
I should've known.


Bono
Hey Larie! I believe you! ^_^


Larie
You also believe you saw the spirit of Rudolph the red-nosed reindeer underneath your bed.


Bono
But it was right there, I swear to god! All glowing...glowing red...


Bono
*shiver*

Larry
The daily routine of this cat is amazing.


Larry
Because she's constantly near me, I found out she sleeps at least sixteen hours a day.


Schnoef-Schnoef
Zzz...


Adam
Wow. It reminds me of the habits of one of our new friends.


Adam
It starts with an 'M' and it ends on 'ike'.


Mike
Hey, now, that's not true.


Mike
I sleep 14 hours a day, spend 2 hours on eating, shopping for groceries and cooking dinner, and spend the other 8 hours on my xbox.


Wilson
Sounds great, but I hope you realize you're doing this with our money, since House and I are the only ones with a decent job.


Mike
Easy now. I let you use the xbox, too.

Wilson
*quiet*

Joe Strummer
Hey, someone's at the door. I think Larie and the guys are back from the cinema.


Snake
No! Don't let them in!


Edge
We come in peace!


Snake
Argh! Too late! Everyone, hide!


Damon Albarn
*hides behind couch*


Liam Gallagher
*also hides behind couch*


Robert Smith
*jumps up and sticks to the ceiling*


Hiro, stepping inside
Wow guys, didn't you totally love Zachary Quinto?


Otacon
Yeah, he was great! But I also loved the appearance of the 'original' Spock!


Loezzy
Chekov was my man! 'Captian Kurk!' Whahaha!


Larie
Okay everyone, quick, to the fanfiction machine!


Larie
*starts computer*


Mike
Let's go watch the original series, too, on the sci fi channel!


Noel Gallagher, behind a chair
Hey, private Pliskin. How long will we have to stay here?


Snake
Judging the rabid looks on their faces...


Snake
Crap. Sorry, people.


Snake
At least a week.

Loezzy
Larie is currently fangirling over a mail she received from Echo.


Larie
She reacted to my mail! And she's my heroine and my idol!


Larie
I just... I could never walk in her famous footsteps! I'm trying, but I could never step up to her level!  ;__;


Loezzy
Oh yeah, you copied this format from her, right?


Larie
Ssh!


Johnny Rotten
HEY EVERYONE! LARIE HERE TOTALLY COPIED THIS FORMAT FROM ECHO!!


Larie
o_________O


Johnny Rotten
Thank you! *bow*


Larie
*sigh*  I'm screwed, aren't I?


Larie
Anyway, if you wanna have a good laugh with U2 and other bands (a better laugh than the ones you'll ever get here!) go to http://echosphere.net/fooksburgh/index.html ! You'll love it!

House
Holy crap, you're way better than me at guitar hero!


Mike
Kthnx. Mind you, though, Edge is even better.


House
My god, Edge! You're a rock god!


Mike
Hush! Don't mess up his concentration!


Edge
Must... finish... song... ah!


Bono
*runs into room, panting*


Bono
Edgie? We're all waiting for you in the garage. I brought your gibson explorer... You can still play real songs, you know, on a real guitar!


Edge
Nnngh... YES!

 
Mike & House
HIGH SCORE!!


Edge
Phew...

Bono
Edgie? Do you have time for your beloved gibson now?


Edge
I think I'm ready.


Bono
Yes?


Edge
I'm switching to expert!

 
Mike & House
OOOH YEAH!


Mike
*handing Edge a towel* You can do it, man! We're behind you!


Bono
;_;

Ian Curtis
What's with the furrowed brow?


Liam Gallagher
I was born this way, okay, asshole? I ain't judging you for looking like a frigging ghost, either!


Ian Curtis
I only meant you're looking rather worried today.


Liam Gallagher
I'm not worried. I'm angry.


Ian Curtis
Well, what's the reason? Depressed? Weltschmerz? Homesick?


Liam Gallagher
Noel, he... he told me I didn't look pretty.


Ian Curtis
Oh dear.

Liam Gallagher
And that's not all! He didn't even tell it to my face, he simply text messaged me!


Ian Curtis
The nerve!

- YESTERDAY -


Damon Albarn
Hey, Noel's cellphone.


Damon Albarn
I could use this. But what could I say that would completely destroy their relationship?


Damon Albarn
... Heh. Brilliant.